Each one of these texts have been written in an hour. I haven't edited them after writing. This is how I express myself in 2014.

25th May 2014: Stop watching

15.

The Finnish rock band Circle once played at Tampere, Finland. It was the most amazing concert I've ever seen. I left after 15 minutes, unable to take in more. 

Last night, I started to watch Southland Tales, a peculiar sci-fi movie from 2006. I went completely crazy over it. While witnessing the first fifteen minutes, I posted several screen shots from the film to a social media site. It was very late and I stopped watching. I'm not entirely sure if I will ever return to the movie. Maybe it can only disappoint me now. And maybe, once again, I got as much as I could handle.

In Circle's case, the music was pretty set from the first songs onwards, so I also left because I had enough of the fantastic they were producing. With Southland Tales it was bit different, since the first 15 minutes are indeed very packed with new information, bizarre plot twists and visual rapid-fire.

Were I really in the gig if I didn't stay until the very last song? Have I seen the movie if I don't even know how it ends? 
I've never read Deleuze & Guattari's seminal book A Thousand Plateaus in its entirety, nor I'm intending to, although it's one of the books that changed my life. In this case, the authors themselves encourage the reader to experience the book as they like, without respecting its chronological order. Digesting the book (I've picked it up numerous times) like this, by randomly reading from a page here, another there, has turned the book into a drug for me. Its words and intensity alter my consciousness for a short period. I really think its genius lies in the way it's written, and much less in what they're saying. It's as if form and content had changed places. 

The way I consume music today resembles this. SoundCloud, a social web site used mostly by songwriters and record labels for sharing their new music to their followers, offers the user the ability to listen to the stream, which consists of all the tracks the people you follow have posted lately. If you happen to follow both people who make sound effects and spiritual leaders, you would then hear sounds of artificial thunderstorm and monologues on meditation. In my case, I hear countless new Hip-Hop tracks, mixtapes, podcasts, demos, 30-second beat loops, and so on. I never know the names of the artists, sometimes not even the context of their activities. I absolutely love this way of consuming (sic) and being immersed in music. 

There was a long period in our history when one could read all the books ever written, since there simply wasn't too many of them. A member of the Danish royal establishment in 16th century Copenhagen could have heard all the musicians playing the so-called royal circuits. Same kind of examples could be pointed out from any other form of art or science, I imagine. 
Today, this is of course impossible. I can only imagine how many new music releases or books or interesting web sites or subversive porn films or profoundly important online discussion threads are born every day. 
You could study to be the expert in the films of Eija-Liisa Ahtila, but then wouldn't you need to also know about, say, early Finnish video art, European cinema, museum exhibition procedures, Nordic art education, installation art, and so on? No one works in a vacuum, and anything can be studied infinitely. Where could possibly you draw a line, by saying: this is where meaningful information and connections to other phenomena concerning this work ends at? Isn't this always more or less a random decision?
It's not that nothing makes sense or that one shouldn't try to understand things. I just believe it's worthwhile to remember that nothing never ends anywhere. 
This is very basic information to anyone doing academic research, and I could assume to anyone who has ever thought about the nature of our understanding of things. We all know it's impossible to grasp the full picture. 

So, why would I need to, for example, read a book in its entirety? In the beginning of my video Death Of You, I address the viewer and tell that if you're hear to check out a style (ie. my style), that's now done. You can stop watching. And I take this seriously. You don't need to see anything I've done all the way through. What good would it bring? Is it not credible to talk about a work you haven't seen in its entirety? What about works that are almost impossible to see in their entirety, like long-durational performances, or the "live sculptures" of Thomas Hirschhorn that go on for 3 months within a residential community? 

Possible reasons and uses for needing to read a book, for example, in its entirety:
1. Auteur: you want to respect the author's intention, and you feel the work in question is meant to be read from the beginning to the end. If you wouldn't do so, you don't think you could understand the work.
2. Peripeteia: you want to know what happens, ie. can the main character get her money back, will Mick and Joe get back together, etc., and you just can't live with the idea of not knowing how the twists in narrative will resolve. 
3. Bourdieu: you want to have this book in your cultural wallet, so if a discussions about the book arises, you can say you've read it. Furthermore, this might result in acceptance from other people, or in the feeling of being in the same level with your friends who have read it. Additionally, the book in question might be a classic or a hot topic, and you don't want to miss out.   
4. Habit: you don't have any particular reason, but it somehow feels wrong not to finish the book, and also it's just something you've learned to do with books, as if it's just the way one operates with such interfaces. 

1. Hard to see why anyone should care about this. The work is out in the world and lives its own life, regardless of its author. In any case, it's almost impossible to know what the author meant by the book. This book in question is an edit. It could've been ten million other things, as well. Maybe the publisher needed to have the book out before Christmas so the author hurried the ending, maybe she was severely depressed and couldn't go on any longer with the book, or maybe it's just like she wants it to be, but then again, if you think how one human being ends up doing a certain thing, you quickly understand that our activities here on Earth are by a large extent guided by chance incidents. 
2. (Peripeteia means a rapid change in narrative: a character is happy and in the next scene he loses everything, etc.) I think this is the most valid reason. Can't argue with that. Although I still think you can understand one's style by reading half a book, or even just few pages. Very rarely does the style itself in a book suffer from peripeteia, so usually you know exactly what you're getting. 
3. How often you actually need the experience of the reading the book from beginning to an end to be able to talk about it? Life really isn't a math test, where you must prove you know an issue thoroughly. If you think of the discussions people have about books, they are almost always very wide-ranging, tied to other topics, and bouncing back and forth. I guess I'm just more into art that's in an open format, a stream, an experience etc. After I've grasped the style of a work, I do not need to know how the narrative end, since the narrative is just entertainment. I could also just check it up from somewhere. A great work for me is a space not a life. The latter has beginning and an ending, whereas the former is infinite and forever.

*

It just that I haven't noticed I would've learned anything from having been into hundreds of concerts or seeing countless art works in museums. Yes, I know more now, but it doesn't really translate into better works or, most precisely, better understanding on how to make great works. 

This is not all I wanted to say, so I'll continue from here tomorrow. I think I should write about teaching: if this is what I believe in, then why do I teach?

Monologue of the day, from last night: 

Monologue #7, Tallinn: NIGHT by ANTAGON

 

24th May 2014: The How and the What

13. 

Two minutes ago, my friend was suggesting in Facebook that contemporary artists are steering towards the how and the what. I felt it would be interesting to talk about those two words today.

Eva Hesse once said something like this: making art is so easy, everything else is hard. I agree. I mean, of course it's easy, since art can be anything. 

Anything? Not something particular? The problem lies in the abstraction: "anything" never really happens as such. 

As a performance artist, for example, I'm truly free to do whatever I want on the stage. Yes. But I'm still a human being: I'm in connection to other people (in this case, the audience), materials and beings and concepts of the world affect me & I usually wish to affect them back. 
What I do on stage is never anything, since nothing ever starts from the beginning, fresh. Christina Kubisch once said that artists always drag their histories and obsessions along to new projects.

I've told the following story many times. I once imagined a box in my mind. The box had a lid. I tried to remove the lid from the top of the box. I couldn't. The lid and the box could not be had apart. There were always a thread of some kind keeping them connected. I tried to imagine two other things and attempted to pick then apart in my mind instead, but to no avail. This is how I understand the world to work. After being in the same space, any two things will stay connected from thereon.

So I never do just anything. Because I can't help but to always create something. I'm doing my thing just by being alive. And whatever I do, it will tie itself together with everything else that I've ever done. My body and the idea of me is the space that holds all my activities together. "Body of work" is not an empty concept to me.

What do I do? I do me. How do I do? As I only can, meaning both "as only I can" and "the only way I know of". 

To have style is to understand you don't have any other choice but yourself. That's why few things are more terrible to us than to not be ourselves. And that's why we care about our style. The style we have is the life we have.

That's the how, I suppose. I'll move along to the what. What is this work about, what am I saying, what should be done, and so on.
 
I don't prepare another thing besides myself to a show, or talk about other things besides the given situation. I don't "do content" because I'm happy with what there is in a space already and how those things connect immediately when I (or anyone else, for that matter) takes the stage.

I don't have the desire to add anything to a situation when I'm doing a performance. Like Jouko Turkka has said, writing is never lonely because you're surrounded by ghosts. The same goes for doing performances. The stage is never empty.

There are unimaginable horrors happening around the world all the time. The fact that there's suffering and injustice sparks a lot of artists to create works that deal with the things that they find to be unjust, overlooked, or misunderstood. 
I constantly ask myself: if I'd be in a room with ten living beings and one of them would be going through great pains, would I not help this suffering being, instead of doing a performance? Answer is simple: I would help. But it's easy to point out that I'm not living my everyday life by such moral.

This crisis of meaningful doing is not limited to artists. Almost everyone of us do some things that are away from relieving the suffering of other beings. 

Ok that’s it for today.

23rd May 2014: What is Sound Design? (explained in under 60 minutes)

12.

I'm a sound designer. It's something I do for fun and/or money. I got my Master of Arts diploma from Theatre academy in Helsinki, the department of sound and light design, in 2009 (btw I never remember how to write the name and or other MA stuff correctly but I'm sure you understand what I mean, right). The school was pretty concentrated on becoming an artist of sorts, and less on the technical matters, although it's hard (but not impossible) to work with sound if you don't know how to use your tools.

Yeah so, why not talk about that, then? I love doing it. The feeling of sitting down in front of a digital workstation at a studio, everything silent around you, no distractions, beautiful sounds flying around your head in the room, it's amazing. That's why I do it for friends for little or no money, and, on the other hand, why I don't have any problem putting together sounds for, say, a toothpaste commercial.

I use sound in my artistic practice, as is evident if you check out Antagon's SoundCloud pages, which hosts a bunch of monologues and audio diaries. Originally, that page was opened for Antagon biennale, but since it's not active at the moment, I've been flooding its account with these recordings, which I also love to do. I enjoy talking and editing. Saying stuff and then adding reverb and bird singing to it. Being in one place then going to another.

What is sound design? First of all, it's very easy, like amazingly so. Amazing is one my favourite words. Also, I don't really know that many adjectives to begin with. So I guess I'm stupid. And I still know how to design sound. This means you'd learn it in a hearbeat. 

Stuff you need to consider when doing sound design:
- Make sure the source material is what you want: like if you're recording someone speaking, do it well so you don't have to come up with stupid tricks later on. If someone else is doing it for you, then make sure they know what they're doing. A lot of times it doesn't matter, so don't overstress or -do it, either. Or if you're doing film sound and you need to use the so-called hunt sound (ie. sound that's being recorded on the shoot), then understand that correcting the original field recordings is insanely annoying.  
- Do not care about conventions, they mean nothing but are just stuff people refer to when they're scared, unsure, or inexperienced. Check out some old movies like I don't know Fellini or like new video art and see how little they care(d) whether all the foley sounds (= effects, like footsteps, sounds of animals etc) or ambiences (= environmental sounds) were on place or not. If you're making art, you can always do whatever, like just whatever. If you're making commercials then more so, but of course the client who pays you decides what she wants to hear, so it's different. There are absolutely no rules when it comes to the relation of moving image and sound, or sound in theatre plays, or how radio plays should be done. FUCK LOGIC USE MAGIC. No one cares if you can do absolutely credible real-life-but-just-better-sounding effects, but everyone is interested if your actors' voices are replaced with that of a mechanical duck. Although lipsync I like, then again Keren Cytter's videos are amazing because of the off-lipsync (not the only reason though, but just saying).
- Don't think about which microphones to use, unless you're doing something where it's absolutely crucial (can't think of anything except live sound to be honest, but then again I do my own thing and don't know why others do what they do). Just use whatever you can find. Same goes for audio software, plugins (= reverb, delay, etc), hardware (=mixers, speakers). If you buy a pair of speakers and use them to mix your stuff, then you'll probably learn how they sound and after some time you know how to use them to do solid mixes that work for all purposes. Just remember to listen to your stuff from different speakers and headphones. Again, this is not always that important, depends what you're doing. 
- If you do video art, mix everything to max volume and you know, so that it generally sounds good. People might show your works in highly varying conditions, so the only thing you can do is to take care of your end. A lot of people still don't do this and it can give you an advantage when all the other works are like muddy and quiet and then there's your work, shining like a diamond. :D
- When you work with other people, make sure you have backups, that you name your files in an understandable manner (example: yourwork-20140524_mix_version1.mp3), and do stick to a chosen logic all through the project. When the project is done, check that your files are in order and all the audio files that the session files are referring to are there in the folder. Like, be tidy, it makes going back to the projects so much more easier. If it's your own stuff, then you of course have the right to not care about this. But consistensy and orderly working methods are really amazing things let me tell you.
- Don't waste too much time on pre-planning when you know the only way to do is to, well, do it. Like trying to think what kind of sounds to use in a theatre play is 99% of the cases absolutely meaningless, since you can only know whether the stuff works or not by going to the rehearsals and trying out your idea with the actors and other people. Sometimes pre-planning can save a lot of time, like if you have a field recording day, then bring extra batteries, extra cables, extra memory cards, tape because you always need to tape something to something. Shit like that saves the day, believe me. Not that I'm that experienced, but this is the truth everyone learns after their 1st or 2nd trick if they have anything going on. Also, don't try do too much stuff at one. Always overestimate the time, never underestimate. Unless you don't mind how things go, then you can do whatever and just be happy with whatever material you get out of it.
-  People say "there are no rules to mixing, use your ears". This is not true. Check out tutorials on how to mix vocals, how to reduce noise, how to compress things together to gain maximum volume, and so on. 
- Don't be afraid, just do whatever as long as you're respectful and emphatetic towards other people. If you don't know what empathy is or can't accept compromises, avoid group work. 
- There's no way to "check all potential solutions". There's like 20000000000000+ recordings of a dog barking to be found in the internet. Accept the fact that whatever material youre checking out, it's never a all-encompassing, full take on what's out there, but just random snippets you've bumped into.
- Sounds mean stuff, that's important too. But sometimes it's all the same what sounds you use. Not doing anything is a great option, too.
- Finally, audio software and equipment is very easy to use. Check out tutorials, ask your friends, sit down and have some willpower. If you've used a computer before, and can use Photoshop or some other design program, then learning to use Ableton Live, for example, will take you a day or two. But if you don't know stuff, don't ever pretend like you do know, because that's always million times more awkward than not knowing.
- I prefer to use sounds that are very concrete and easily recognizable, because then the listener will understand what I'm doing. Abstract sounds are meant for relaxation and academic research. 

Ok, that's all I know.

This didn't take me an hour, more like 30 minutes, so I quit now.

I do have a feeling I've forgotten something, like maybe about the sociological side of sound design, or the politics of sound, but yeah maybe more next time.

Monologue of the day:

 

21st May 2014: Doing and writing theatre, art and politics, art schools

11.

a. you want to be political, get politicized? i am thinking about it, constantly.
a. shit, there's no one here. the air is moist, i understand i should get out of here to save my skin but i need to do this first. this monologue, the take a look at yourself, the real talk. 
a. but i need feedback. i dont wanna be alone here talking to myself. ok ok ok i got it, i'll use delay.
a. is it working
a. (delay) ...is it working
a. yes!
a. (delay) ...yes!
a. dub!
a. (delay) ...dub-dub-dub-dub-dub...(fades out)
a. (stops the delay) ok i want to delays, one for when i speak very silently and the other for when i speak real loud.
a. (screams) i will create some change around here!
a. (delay) ...here...here...
a. (whispers) i'm so afraid
a. (delay) ...afraid...afraid...
a. (stops the delay) great now i have these two guys as back-up. 

Oh God almighty that's terrible. That's the kind of shit I write almost every day to no avail. The idea of play espaces me. Just the practicalities: That I would figure out those delay things with an actor and a technician, it just seems like such a distant thought. Things I like about the idea of writing a play: 
    1. You can say what you want, but through characters, so people don't read     everything through you, the author. This allows for thought experiments.
    2. Theatre makes so much sense as a phenomenon. To have a stage     where people freely elaborate on the human condition.

Problem is, I can't seem to take the doing of theatre apart from writing it. If I want to do theatre, then I just start do it, on the spot. I want to do things, not think about doing them. I get that writing is an act of doing something, but for me it's a work of art in its own, like writing shouldn't lead to another art work. 

Then, about the being political thing I had on the beginning of this text. Here's what I think about art & politics. For the rest of this writing sessions (approx 35 minutes left), I'll talk about that.

There will never be a permanent solution to the relationship of art and society. Art will keep on testing the limits of the society it's in. That's why art can't be set to any certain role.And a healthy society wants to be questioned and critizied. 
This game-like functioning of art should be kept in mind when we think of, say, art education, funding, and the role of various institutions. 

Then, about what artists actually do: it's a question of what kind of world do you want to be building. Just as I can criticize a group of people (like a political party) for their opinions and actions, I can do this as an artist, and towards other artists, as well. But just as no one can force me to vote, no one can make me do certain kind of art. If I have anything going in my brains, I listen to other people and adjust my opinions & actions when needed. This means that someone could talk me into voting or making certain kind of art. And I should understand people might disagree with me and I should be able to defend my opinions & actions. It's not a static reality, but, ideally, a disursive one. 

That's all. So: 1. The role and meaning of art is under constant change, 2. Just like all the other citizens, artist should do what they think is best,  3. We should be able to talk about it.

Boring as hell I guess.

Section 3, talking: In Finland, there's usually one discussion going on at once (when it comes to art-related discussions). Lately, it's been funding. Reasons for why we are talking about it: 
- most galleries ask the artists to pay for the opportunity to show their works. Virtually everyone resents this, but still the system stays unchanged (it might be so, because almost all the exhibitions artists do are supported by the state or a private foundation, so from what I've heard & experienced, it's somewhat unusual to actually pay the gallery rent "yourself").
- after the most recent economic crisis, there have now been cuts to art funding in Finland, too.
- Curators, who tend to like to criticize prevailing structures, are stepping in to the game, since there are now 2 new master-level univesity programs offering a degree in curating. The curators in Finland rarely receive any of the art funding, not to mention how rare (less rare now, though) it is to actually curate a proper (define it as you will) show in Finland as a freelancer. 
- a host of artists build their careers outside of Finland. They might still live, at least part-time, or have projects there, so they might keep on following the discussions and commenting on it (some of the most interesting output recently has come from either Finnish artists who are based somehwere else or artists expats living in Finland). Since Finland (like Estonia) are exceptional with this artist-pays-the-rent system, most people see the Finnish system as untenable after working or coming from abroad. This reason is a bit weak, since I'm sure people have been aware of the realities in other places for a long time, surely artists were traveling in previous decades as well, although before EU and cheap flights and internet, Finland was supposedly much, much more insular.

Section 1, constant change. As much as I'd like to see this in action, I feel like the reality of art-making at large (from education to exhibiting) is in a static state. I don't know what's right, but for me it's hard to understand the idea of an art school. 
I mean let's begin from the beginning. You want to be an artist. The job title is not protected, so after you've decided to be an artist, it's up to you to make (or not make) people know you're an artist now. There is nothing you should be good at, because it's not about skills (tags: de-skilling, post-studio, postmodernism). It's mostly about having the guts to show your stuff to people. 

I believe in this blog I'm writing, for example. 
- I get that the format is dated, but then I wanted a platform to put out text in a way that I can share it with other people. It's a big bonus that this comes without a readymade platform (tumblr, medium.com, facebook notes etc), and is instead hosted on a private web site and managed by a sane person. 
- The content of this blog might not be interesting to anyone, but I really think it is interesting, because this is the kind of stuff I read myself: confessional blog posts, ramblings, musings, ruminations, essays, artist statements, etc.
- the format might not be that user-friendly, and the one hour limit for writing each post is pretty stupid, but it's a thing that keeps me going, and the format comes with they way I write.
- Of coutse, you can not write off the social, economic etc side of making art, and me doing what I do, etc. 

Back to those basics. So, you can make what you want, you can call yourself an artist, but if you want people to engage with what you do, you must show your stuff. But you've just started, and you might be unsure, lonely, or just in need of a good conversation with a fellow artist, or wanting to hear from someone more experienced. 
Here's where art school comes in. That's all there is to an art school, for me. Ideally, it's a safe place for talking, growing, and for forming peer-to-peer relationships.  
If you want to know about art history, for example, you could use online courses or go to lectures at universities, a bunch of them are free for everyone to enter. I guess that's my art school manifesto.
If you think what material resourcses one needs for this kind of an art school, there aren't that many. But then again, we have this natural tendency to keep on building things and expanding. It's very hard to keep things simple and small.

no monologue today.

17th May 2014

10.

For the next hour, I will try to come up with slogans. Like, write them. I didn't plan this beforehand, and I don't have any good ones on my mind. OK here we go.

I asked you for directions not company
(To be honest, I was reading Strike magazine where an anarchist named David Graeber said "If I ask someone for directions, I don't expect them to say "five pounds, please.", so this was a somewhat rude take on that one.)

Hmm, I'm noticing now this is harder than I thought. Slogans are usually made for a particular purpose, like political propaganda, advertising a product, etc. They don't work that well without a context. And if you've read my previous posts, you know that's the one thing I'm lacking (if that's even possible). 
At the moment, Europe is full of slogans because of the EU elections. Some Finnish guy had "Decideful and optimistic" as a slogan on his ad. There was a picture of him, cut from breast up. He had a a sort of messy longish hair but still clean, with subtly unshaven facial hair, and it looked like his hands were in his pockets which is not a sign of decidefulness, and he was facing the viewer diagonally like not knowing where to stand, he was wearing a grey neutral-ish suit but with a vest that spoke of old-fashioned sentiments. (If you're reading this, I'm sorry if it sounded mean, I don't know you personally or what your campaign is about, this was an impression and I got in a manners of seconds).

Slogans are a way of solving a problem. That's how I've came up with them before, under pressure. I've curated something, a show, that has been needing a title or tagline. So, I guess I could write slogans for my artistic practice.

Kimmo - nothing is normal
(it means: saying nothing is completely normal, not having any content is OK. But I don't like the connotations with the word normal. As my gym teacher said (I was 11), there is no thing as normal.) 
or:
Kimmo - nothing is OK

Since I talk about grants and money a lot in my works, I could do a slogan for the Finnish Arts Promotion Centre, the public institution that hands out national & regional artist grants. The institution is better known by the acronym TAIKE.

No money, No Monet - Taike
(it would be great if they could base this with historical facts about Monet's supporters, but I don't actually know how he made his living. Also, Monet is not a Finnish artist, and Taike doesn't have any reason to advertise themselves abroad, I suppose. Then again, it would be good if they'd reach to artists living in Finland who don't speak Finnish. And since no one knows any Finnish artists, maybe it's good, then.)

When Life Gives You a Cash Cow, Make Milk - Taike
(oh dear)

Maybe she's born with it, maybe it's Taike
(a socialist take on the Maybelline eyeliner's amazing, classic slogan. I really don't like stuff that is just a play on something existing and legendary, unless it's really old or semi-forgotten and the new version kinda electrifies it. This slogan here is shit, although I like the idea of Taike pointing out that in Finland you don't need to born into money in order to make art - the state can help you out. Anyway, I really think Taike should bang the drum about how great it is that we have a state that supports culture without strings attached. Surely it's not this simple, and there's a lot that could be criticized in their activities, but you know I'm now looking at this from the position of an ad man.)

either or and taike
(sort of anything goes, we support whatever. "tai" means or in Finnish. I don't know why I'm writing these in English anyway. OK time to change the subject.)

Who would need a slogan? Hmm, maybe Ptarmigan, my host organisation for this residency in Tallinn. They do so much stuff, put up events workshops sessions etc, and I imagine that there are people out there who don't have a solid understanding of Ptarmigan's activities and, more importantly, its ethos. For me, Ptarmigan is about doing things just the way you want, without respecting art/activist cultures' existing modes. I could even go as far as to say that Ptarmigan is taking art back from art world, like making creativity fun, communal, shared, and career-free again. 

Ptarmigan - art without art
(what I just said)

Ptarmigan: Hard to say, easier to stay
(the name is really hard to pronounce if you don't happen to know that the P should be silent. A not a lot of people know what a ptarmigan is (it's a bird). So I think you should take your supposed weakness and start from there. And with the "stay" thing, we're referring to the residency and maybe the workshops and projects that span over a long period of time. Also "hard to say" means that you're not sure of something, and as such refers to people not knowing what to think of Ptarmigan.)

You make it at Ptarmigan
(since Ptarmigan encourages people to come up with their own proposals, to take command of the activities happening there, this could also work. Again, a boring reference to "You make it a Sony"). Not so happy about this one, to be honest.)

Anything goes & nothing works & everyone plays
(a way to capture Ptarmigan's spirit of 1. being open about the equality of ideas, 2. projects not working since the projects are tests in themselves and kids that's how science is, and finally, 3. not always having a performer and the audience but everyone together. I like the use of & here, like the tote bag with a group of famous people's (like models, rappers, etc.) first names on capital letters.)

Let's show
(this is about revealing your inner self in a group (how the best werkshops tend to give us the space to show your inner workings), showing other people, showing off, having a show (not something Ptarmigan really does but since Ptarmigan still has very clear ties to art, let's keep it there). I think I like this a lot.)

I started to think a tour t-shirt by Nine Inch Nails from like thirteen years ago. The Fragile 2CD had just came out, and on one of the tracks Trent Reznor is signing "Where the fuck were you?", referring to a tough life situation where the protagnist were left alone. They used this line on the t-shirt. It was amazing. On the front, it had the iconic NIN logo, and on the back, it listed the dates and places of their European tour, with WHERE THE FUCK WERE YOU? as a title. It worked even if you didnt know the lyric reference, but if you knew, it made you belong to the same group with the person wearing the shirt. I loved it then and I love it now.

"Where do you want to go today" by Microsoft Windows is an amazing one, as well. It reminds of me Finland joining EU, of Berlin wall breaking down, of de-regulated markets, of my first trips abroad, of the allure of Interrail and learning German in high school, of leaving my small home town behind for good, of the permanent, revolutionary effect Internet has had in our lives, and of technological determinism and of scientific positivism, and lastly, of the fake feeling of choice consumer electronics offer us.

btw, right here is a great text about slogans, written by Sezgin Boynik. 

TAIKE - old deal
(socialist democracy with an old-school, mature vibe. and of course the reference to US's economic ideas of 30's ie new deal, of promises kept broken, but with Taike still delivering what's promised, ie. the good ol' deal of the state supporting the artists.)

OK now just some random stuff:

High sore (like for a cough medicine thing etc, the ad should have something to do with high score, like partying hard with beautiful people screaming in the club, and then the next day solving all sore throat problems with this cough drug. Maybe even: High Score, Low Sore)

Bring it Off (this could work for the Finnish anti-mosquito deodorant OFF)

You're in the air tonight
(perfume commercial. spread this shit around you to set the tone for the evening. in the ad, a woman (she is caucasian-asian, ie. fascist norm + blatantly racist exotism) walking, beautiful summery boulevard, the scent making not just men (hetero-oppressive) but the whole city go crazy for her and her scent. A remix of Phil Collins' in the air tonite playing, but without the sad lyrics. Try this: Sean Glatt - Feel It. We need Major chords there, happiness. Maybe just use the drum break from the song. or nothing at all, screw indie references and catering to esoteric ironic taste buds.)

I'm trying to think of a gun commerical but can't hack it. A play on the words arms, naturally. Maybe using Bon Jovi's Lay Your Arms On Me somehow. Or maybe it should not have any references to guns at all, but only safety and your loved ones. No image of guns at least.

Well slogans, that was the point, let's get back to it. I'll try one for Kiasma, the contemporary art museum in Helsinki, Finland.

show on, show off
(again the play with the word show. and a reference to karate kid, maybe reconstruct that bit from Karate Kid movie where they wax on, wax off a car.)

Nothing is not boring
(and again, using the word nothing as something art could potentially be.)

It's just a building
(emphasising that the building itself doesn't really matter in the end, it's the content, the art works, that it's all about. since the Kiasma building is such a predominant fixture in Helsinki cityscape, this could work maybe. Though maybe Kiasma should do the opposite and start taking itself super seriously instead. they've already tried humor and playfulness in their campaigns, like the "i don't quite understand..." and post-it notes stuff and the logo they have.)
 
Kiasma: more serious than life
(nah)

This is not for you, this is about you
(i like this. how art isn't there to serve anyone, but it still connects us and communicates, since an art work always speaks about and reflcets the time it was made in.)

Finally, here's the Phil Collins remix I mentioned earlier:


 

16th May 2014

9.

I'm used to saying that Finnish art institutions have a horizontal power structure. This makes it easy to contact people, since you don't have to go through assistants. But maybe it's not true after all. 
Finnish art world is so small, that even the structures we have now seem too heavy. Art seems to be the most conservative world when it comes to structural change. The art institutions I know of are surprisingly old-fashioned in their operations. Exhibitions are done with all the traditional pomp and circumstance, with catalagoues, paper invitations, formal and bland opening speeches and performances, and so on.

The more I write, the more I notice how limited my vocabulary is. I've written "so on" and "somewhat" a thousand time. Most of my sentences start with "It's" or "I". I don't have any idea whether "pomp and circumstance" means what I think it does. Since I don't ("Since" is a popular one too btw) do any research, these writings are full of me saying I "guess", "assume", "feel", and so on (see). 
Not that it matters (that's how & when I change the paragraph), or maybe it does. I'm not saying anything, and on top of that, I'm saying it in a repetitive, lifeless way. John Cage: "I have nothing to say and I'm saying it.", Kimmo Modig: "I have somewhat nothing to say and so on". [audience laughter]

Well it's time to leave these questions aside and start organising yourself. It's sad that Finland hasn't seen a raid of protests. Sad, because we are facing brutal cuts and privatisation measures, while giving companies even more power over our immaterial rights, or just simply over our lives. So when we wake up, it might already be too late. 
Not that I wish for protests targeting a certain cause, quite the opposite actually. I was very happy to see a protest in Helsinki titled "Nyt riittää!", meaning Enough is enough. It's a direct link to the Horizontalidad movements around the globe, where people come together to figure out new ways of being and working together, instead of opposing a specific thing. It is really true: the system in itself doesn't work, so it's futile to point out a thing or two and oppose them. I support a change that starts from the way we act together, and I do believe in leaderless, horizontal action. 
I don't have any idea what art has to do with it. True, art for me is about questions of being and communicating, and in art you can represent utopian and even illogical ways of existing. It has took me a long time to truly realize this. I'm still doing works that I don't believe in, in a structural-symbolic level that is. To be more precise, I'm doubting the structures I work in, like me being on a stage, talking to the audience, listening. 
My work has been so much about me. Now I'm looking for a way to keep doing that but in a more, I don't know, shared and horizontal way, for lack of better words. And as I said, I do lack better words.

I might also just give up on making art. Although saying it feels like I'd be 14 and making dubious threats to my parents to run away, or something. But I've been alone in a room somewhere far from home thinking this it I can't take this pressure anymore, but I always end up thinking "No, I can't let this break me, I will keep on keeping on". Because this is what I do, this is all I do. I could do something else, and I have done something else, too. But I always find myself back here, performing, recording writing, suggesting‚ collaborating, and linking.

Hyperlinks, dear God how I just love hyperlinks. They changed my view of everything. That we actually found out a way to link everything into everything else. I think that's the most beautiful thing that has ever happened. Hyperlinks is a world wonder.

Why I always talk about MYSELF, why are my videos and other works about MYSELF? Because it's the safest thing to do. And I will keep to it even more so in the future. MYSELF ables infinite possibilites without compromises. And if I find a boundary, I can deal with it directly in the work. MYSELF is the method. MYSELF is a work condition that can reflect itself immediately. The aftermath and the planning both come together in MYSELF.  

(a minute passes) Most of this hour I spent watching out from the window. (2 and a half minutes) Now I'm just waiting for the time to run out. (20 seconds) There.

14th May 2014

8.

what you see is what you can't get but if you'd 
just let yourself see things for what they are, without You

"...land of a foreign account, written in bold, "

as promised, i've kept chasing, 
you were 12

You still are

you were 12
on a night "everchanging", she still sings

---

room so spacious
wows, oohs, and what are you doing theres
don't answer, you should not answer
The event starts in two hours
colorful textiles need to be set up,
calls getting re-directed,
resulting in dull feedback

He still needs you not to listen too carefully
the material's too weak, just is

--

Late afternoon without any sounds really
reverberant waves of white noise 
hours best spent some place else

---